My heartfelt words
To err is human. Randomly, I recalled some things I said out without using my brain. I feel regretful, I feel bad. I asked myself if I was honest to everyone about everything. My answer was in percentage: 99%, 95% and unknown percentage. This's what I think of the percentage.
99% which means 1% dishonest is because I forgot about it so it's left unsaid. For the 95% which means 5% dishonest is either because I scare to hurt his/her pride or if I say out, those words will let him/herself feel ashamed of him/herself of what he/she did/said.
Also, the 5% could be A told me about B but I can't do it my own way and 'help' A to tell B what A was telling me about and should respect A.
(Even if I may prefer B more.)
I do feel bad keeping it for A and keeping it from B.
I know it may seems biased as I only will agree what A says if B is still not changing from I experienced and if it's the FACTS.
No matter if I agree with A or don't agree with A, it's still 5% dishonesty to B.
Another thing is that, if I was once 100% honest to a person, once that person changes, once he/she lost my respect, there won't be 100% anymore. It may drop to, 50%, lesser than that, maybe more than that, I really don't know how to calculate.
(I will still treat him/her as a friend, depending on how much he/she changes.)
But if anyone of you ask me something which won't hurt your pride, won't make you feel ashamed of yourself and won't let me 'help' people translate what he/she said about you, I'll consider telling you so but maybe after that we won't be friends if you hate me for telling you the facts and truths.
(Of course, I hope not. I hope honesty helps rather than harm.)
Last but not least, if you know or heard I said some things about you, please come and clarify with me.
NOT complaining about me behind my back when you don't even know the facts. It doesn't help. It will worsen.
I'll be honest of what I had said. I won't lie to others. I don't feel good doing that either.
Like what Sharon(a friend that has been with me for few years) said, not everything you can say out, I do agree too.
But for my point of view, I will say everything out except for the points I mentioned above.
